Take Responsibility – Become the Boss of you!


Responsibility – The word has a variety of meanings, all similar and along the same lines, but the one I am interested in is this:

“The state or fact of being accountable or to blame for something.”

Responsibility is almost a dirty word in today’s blame culture society. It certainly seems to be an old-fashioned and out-of-date concept. In a world where we are encouraged to share our lives with our peers on social media, the very idea of admitting that we are accountable is almost unconscionable.  However, as I have mentioned in a previous post, you are totally responsible for everything that happens in your life. Everything that comes into your life is attracted by you, good, bad indifferent, everything. It may not be your fault, and you may not have meant to do it, but it is your responsibility because your thoughts attracted it. It may seem harsh in certain circumstances, but it is Universal Law.

A Short History of Me and Responsibility.

As a youngster, the word ‘responsibility, always instilled a feeling of dread in me. It usually came in the form of the following sentence, “who is responsible for this?”, or “you must learn to take responsibility for your actions!”, meaning that I had generally been found out for some misdemeanor, or misdeed, either unintentional or not. I, therefore, grew up denying all responsibility for anything and became a master of the carefully crafted and elaborate excuse. Or, better still, an expert at ‘passing the buck.’

I spent the better part of my entire life lying, deceiving, and generally trying to weasel and blame my way out of any uncomfortable situation, whether I thought that I was actually at fault or not. This form of behavior continued well into my thirties, and it wasn’t until I hit my forties, and I had suffered a marriage break up, that the penny finally dropped – this might just have been my fault, I might just bear some responsibility for the demise of my marriage. This revelation actually made me feel ashamed of myself, not so much for the break-up of the marriage, this was inevitable, (our kids were delighted and said it should have happened years sooner!), but for the fact that I realized that I had treat my family and my marriage disrespectfully like I had with every other situation in my life.

This revelation was enough of a kick in the butt for me to take a good, long, and hard look at myself and my life. It soon became patently obvious to me that many of the problems and issues that I had had in my life were definitely due to a lack of responsibility on my part. It was an epiphany, that I remember as clearly as if it happened yesterday. I decided then and there that I would never lie again, that I would never make another excuse again, that I would face any uncomfortable situation head-on, in short, I would take responsibility for everything in my life, ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING. At that very moment, I felt a huge weight lift from my shoulders, it was a truly life-changing moment for me, almost miraculous! For the first time in my life I felt truly free, truly unburdened, truly powerful, and truly clean.

“If life knocks you down, try to fall on your back – because if you can look up, you can get up!”

Les Brown – Motivational Speaker.

Responsibility Empowers You!

One of the important things that I quickly realized was that if I was responsible for my life, and everything that happened in it, then I was in total control of my life, every part of it! Knowing this gave me an enormous sense of power, a power that I had never felt before. I was no longer like a leaf blowing this way and that at the mercy of the wind, my destination was mine to decide, my future was mine to create. My life was mine, and mine alone. I realized then that I am the boss of me. Period. When you feel that, it is a feeling of true inner power and strength.

Responsibility Sets You Free!

Taking responsibility, owning up, meant that I no longer had anything to fear. The fear was gone because I no longer had anything or anyone to hide from, I was transparent. I was no longer concealing or hiding anything, so I was also free from guilt and free from burden! It was amazing how liberating this all felt, and it far outweighed any anxieties that I may have had about the consequences that I would have to endure as a result of my taking responsibility.

Alleviate Stress When You Take Responsibility.

When I take responsibility for anything, I own it, it’s my baby. As I have said, I have full control, I get to decide how it goes, how I deal with it. In my experience, when I take responsibility for a problem, an issue, or a project I have less worry and stress, (if any at all!), as I am in total control, and I am not relying on others to help me out of the situation.

I now sleep the sleep of a guilt-free and carefree man. I also found that I sleep so much better now I take responsibility for things, that I sleep soundly through the night without waking.

Taking Responsibility Aids in Problem Solving.

Taking responsibility nearly always forces me into taking positive action. Positive action is a powerful answer to any problem or situation that I may find myself facing. Taking positive action increases my confidence, clears my thinking, and focuses my mind, giving me the ability to work effectively on a problem or project and work out the perfect solution.

Responsibility Builds Self-Reliance.

I have further found that owning a problem, and taking responsibility for it, increases my self-confidence, as it forces me to think outside the box, to look at new ways of doing things, and to enhance my problem-solving skills. This in turn helps me to develop self-reliance, become more independent, and ultimately grow as a human being. And, once I have taken responsibility and started down the road, I almost always end up really enjoying the journey.

Gain Experience When You Take Responsibility.

If you never experience anything new, then you never learn anything new. Taking responsibility pushes me out of my comfort zone, it moves me to do, and to learn new things, I am compelled to work out how to navigate unfamiliar and uncomfortable situations. I gained invaluable experience from these events, an experience that I would not have had had I decided not to take responsibility. This will always stand me in good stead the next time I come up against a similar situation.

Taking Responsibility Sets you Apart.

I have learned to have far more respect for those who take responsibility for their actions, their mistakes, their lives. I am often more forgiving, more generous, and more likely to give the benefit of the doubt to those who take responsibility. I am certain taking responsibility shows a strength of character, it shows confidence, it shows maturity and yes, it shows, well, it shows responsibility. These are all valuable assets that are saleable in today’s modern world.

A Last Word on Responsibility.

A last word – taking responsibility for yourself, for your actions, and for your life, is tantamount to owning it. Do you want to own your own life, or are you happy to leave it to someone else? I will leave you with a couple more lines from one of the most inspiring speakers it has been my pleasure to listened to, Les Brown;

“Take Ownership for your life. Nobody’s gonna live your dream for you. Nobody’s gonna take care of your business like you.”

“Stop coming up with excuses – don’t give yourself permission to live a small life. You can’t fit a big dream into a small life!”


I was 52 years old before I learned my most important life lessons: Life can be so much easier than we choose to make it. My life is in my hands – it is what I make of it. Life can be as happy, loving, joyous, fulfilling and downright amazing as I choose it to be. The Universe loves me and wants me to be happy, prosperous, fulfilled. Things will always turn out for the best in the end. Have faith, let things go, ask and trust in the Universe. I have a choice! I have always had a choice! And I have more power and opportunity than I ever realised!

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